Everyone keeps telling me to write. Write Bree, write about this, write about that, write when you're happy, write when you're sad, write when you're right, write when you're wrong. I find I write only when something is such a deep, raw emotion that I feel like if I DON'T write it down, it'll just rub me until I bleed from the inside out. I write when I feel like I HAVE to get the word's out because otherwise they'll be like my own form of toxic poison. How crude and awful of me to say that my own words and thoughts are like poison. I apologize.
But everyone is their own worst enemy right?
The amount of change that has overcome me in the past month since I've moved home is a bit ridiculous. I'm not sure if sharing every mundane and obscurely huge detail of my private life is 100% appropriate at this time, but I do think that everything in life happens for a reason. This has been proven to me time and time again..and in the past few days...time and time again...again. I just have to remember what I already know, even if the reminder is coming from a least-suspected source...in the form of a question...answering my own question...questioning my own answer...being referred to again that everything happens for a reason.
Sorry for the riddled tongue twister. I'm just merely blabbing. Trying to help a slightly-uninspired mind find a little inspiration.
The other night, something really beautiful and magical DID happen between my dear friend Kelly, my brother Jonathan, my little cousin Noah and I. We got into a deep, heartfelt intellectual conversation. It involved the universe and life and light and soul and body and mind. Topics that I think we were too afraid to approach on our own, but as the circle of love opened up around us we let everything out. Even Noah, who's only 10, proved that he's an older soul that I think any of us could have guessed. But just the spill of emotions and new ideas was so beautiful, the energy in the room literally changed. It was a tangible, electrical, amazing energy that you could almost ALMOST hold in your hands. To be surrounded by such a diverse group of long-time family and friends and know that we can share anything and say anything without being judged was really wonderful. We had trust in each other and created an amazing bond between all of us, just by merely talking.
I don't know where I'm going with this...I guess if I can give you a moral of my ramblings it would be just to go out into the world tomorrow with an open mind. Everyone, every situation, every single little thing and person and event that comes across your path happens for a reason. A reason that many of us won't know until years down the road. I'm thankful for the amazing people that are in my life right now, and for the amazing people that used to be in my life, because deep-down, I've learned invaluable life lessons from all of you that I could never have learned on my own.
Be open minded. Ok? Ok.
Good night.
Bree
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