Tomorrow is Father's Day.
I'm living far away from my family, all the way across the ocean and not being able to spend important days like Mother's Day, Father's Day, birthdays, etc with my family is something that I have become used to. Well, not used to, but you have to learn to live with it. Because if you sit around and think about how sad it is to be so far away from all the people you love than you can become increasingly down. So, you send all your love and energy over the seas and hope that they find their way into the hearts of your dearest.
And living far away from you family and friends on an island, figuring out how to balance your life paycheck to paycheck, also means that sending gifts or even taking moms and dads out to dinner is near impossible. So...I figured, Dede...I am going to do the next best thing that I can. I'm going to write about you.
I know some people think that they have a connection with their dads...and I hope that you do. But no one I think has quite the same connection as me and my daddy. Ever since I was little, I've been a daddy's girl. My dad taught me everything I know. My dad is an incredibly spiritual person and I've always felt a connection with that. I remember being little and looking through books of my dads of gurus and life and the universe and light. My dad patiently answered all my questions about the mysteries of life. He let me stare wide-eyed at the pages and pictures of gurus and Hindu gods and let me sit with him and pretend to meditate. From a tiny girl up until today I can call my dad and talk to him about energies and life and know that he will understand me completely.
My dad is the biggest supporter of whatever it is I wanted to do. I have a gypsy mindset...which I half blame his DNA for...where I can't seem to sit still. This could also be the ADD (which I also blame his DNA for), but regardless my wanderlust and excitement to jump on bandwagons I can only imagine would have been frustrating for a parent. "I want to horseback ride! I want to do taekwondo! I want to do soccer! I want to surf! I want to go to get a GED! I want to go to college! I want to go to college in Hawaii! Move back to a different island, go back to California, back to Hawaii! Change jobs!" And through all of my explosive and non-thinking actions, guess who has always been there cheering me on? My dad. He patiently would listen to me declare that "This is it! This is what I want to do!" and than calmly try to talk the pro's and con's into me. Regardless of my decision, my dad was at every soccer game, every practice, every crying phone call when reality in Honolulu set in. My dad has picked me up from the airport, funded my trans-Pacific flights and the entire time encouraged me to do the best and be the best at everything I do. And I have really strived to be the best person I can be simply because I have a dad that believes in me.
I am more like my dad than I even realize at times. We both have a love for the ocean and creatures. We have incredibly similar spiritual beliefs. Whenever I feel like the sky is falling, I know that my dad knows exactly what I'm going through. My dad has not only raised (and fully supported) a gypsy-minded daughter, but also raised two amazing sons. Between all of my soccer and horseback riding excursions my dad was at every (and even coaching!) one of my brother's football games and all of Jonathan's track meets. He is the biggest Coast Guard supporter and honestly one of the greatest Gay Right's supporters out there.
I remember being little and having my dad go on location to San Francisco. He wrote me a letter and drew the Bay Bridge on it. I remember being so upset that he was gone for so long I held onto that letter in my night stand and read it every night. I still have that letter! My dad goes on locations all over the world, Mexico, Tennessee, Louisiana, Prague, Portland. I know how it feels to be far away from your family but I can't imagine doing it all alone. My dad is an incredibly strong man.
Now that I am planning a wedding and thinking about my life and my future, I'm starting to realize that a lot of traits and characteristics in my future husband remind me of my dad. Tyler opens doors for me, my dad has always opened doors for me. Tyler walks around to get my car door, so does my dad. Tyler lets me walk through doors first, so does my dad. There are a lot of things I suppose my subconscious mind picked up on in Tyler that reminded me of my dad. Those characteristics and traits are what I associate a REAL man with...because my dad is the best man I know. I guess I hope that maybe one day IF and my I emphasize the IF part...we have children...Tyler will be as good of a dad to our kids as mine was to me.
In planning a wedding and thinking of a father/daughter dance and my dad walking me down the aisle, it kind of makes me get a bit choked up. This is my dad. He's taught me everything I know. I am so proud to have a connection with him. My dad is one of my best friends. I hope I've made you proud...despite actually not sending you a gift (love you...).
I have the BEST dad in the whole world. Happy Father's Day dede :)
